ATTENTION-EXCHANGESM
IS BASED ON THE FOLLOWING IDEAS
(These ideas aren't new but perhaps they are to you.)
Use them.
1. We human beings are thinking all the time. Therefore, it is very useful for people to get together frequently and listen to one another talk about anything and everything without interruption, for an equal length of time.
(Knowing there will be no interruptions, each person can relax and really focus on and share their widely-ranging and changing thoughts and feelings. Knowing that no one will be ignored or accidentally left out, and aware that they don't have to listen for an indefinite length of time, each person can gladly dedicate their attention to one another.)
2. When two or more individuals give one another equal-time, it makes sense for them to acknowledge emotion rather than pretend it's not there. In addition to acknowledging emotion, practitioners of equal-time formats are free to decide to fully experience their emotions--to cry if they feel like crying, to laugh and get extraordinarily silly if they feel like doing so (even if laughter and silliness seems inappropriate), and to rage a bit (or a lot) if they feel anger.
(Current scientific research proves that not only do we naturally respond, as part of our evolutionary heritage, to everything with emotion, our every step and decision is influenced by emotion even though we may "feel" nothing. Life becomes richer and means more to us when we thoughtfully experience our emotions.
3. ATTENTION greases the wheels of thought and emotion. People who never have anything to say, who honestly believe they do little or no real thinking, discover that their minds are a cornucopia of thought and emotion, of ideas and feelings that are meaningful, sometimes painful, always valuable, usually fun, and frequently exhilarating.
UNTIL WE HAVE TRULY EXPERIENCED THE GIFT AND POWER OF ATTENTION WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WE HAVE BEEN MISSING.
|